Friday, July 24, 2009

From Dylan to Mozart

Everybody has nursed a broken heart. I remember the first time I had my heart broken, I was in HS, and I thought the world was ending. Of course it wasn't the last time I cried over a boy... but it wasn't until my father died that I had experienced the deepest heart break, an experience that was and is simply unparalleled to any other loss of love. At first, I actually treated his death like a "break up", I established a time frame, I believed that if I 'allowed' myself to fall apart for X amount of days, then I'll get over it. I deleted all of his emails, VMs, and removed everything in my immediate circumference that reminded me of him (I didn't throw anything meaningful away, I just put them away). I continued my life, and I waited, I tried to feel better, I tried to forget and the harder I tried, the worse it became. I started to think, how I had seen him only a few months ago, what is it going to be like after not seeing him for years? Finally I succumbed to my emotions and accepted the fact that I was never getting over this. I don't want to get over him, I don't want to forget him. The love I have for him, is never going to die.

My father was a musician and if it wasn't for him, and my mother too:) I don't believe I could possibly of learned to love and appreciate all music the way that I do. I remember when I was little, my father would listen to classical music, I thought it was really boring, and I didn't understand why he loved it so much. I realize now, as with most music, the only way anyone can feel feel and appreciate music, is when they have lived and loved.

To celebrate my father's Birthday, his life and all of my memories of him, I created a playlist of some of his favorite music from Mozart to Dylan.